Are you stuck in middle of mental slavery of what surrounds you i.e what people think about you, how they make you feel, how what they say or do affects you, what they will say or do if you tried something different etc. Okay before you read the steps first understand that you can never please everyone, no matter how good you try to be people will still hate & love you at the same time. So here are tools you can use to reframe your thinking.
1. BREATH IMMEDIATELY
Fear makes your breathing shallow which is the moment, exacerbates the fear. Take deep breaths before you respond. This will help you calm your mind and body.
2. GET CLARIFICATION
Refuse to get dragged down in the muck of your anger by jump-ing to conclusions. Explain how what you just heard makes you feel. Ask question to help you clarifu by what the other person meant.
3. STOP COMPLAINING
Complaining to others about how someone else made you feel is like dumping a bucket of poop on the person at the receiving end. Plus, it triggers you to replay your grievance.
4. REFUSE TO GO IN THE GUTTER
Take the high road. You may feel good by lashing out in the mome-nt, but you will pay the price with guit & regret. Let it wash off you, make an agreement not to dwell on it.
5. YOU CAN’T PLEASE EVERYONE
Accept it. Like it or not, there will always be people who will dislike you and get off by criticizing you. Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t mattet, and those who matter don’t mind.
6. DUMP TOXIC PEOPLE
If you choose to justify yourself with guit or fear about letting toxic people go, that is your choice. Then don’t complain later.
7. REALIZE THAT EVERYTHING IS NOT ABOUT YOU
Enough said. When you let it get personal the cost becomes personal too. You are opening your own heart here. You sure, you wany to do that.