We need to talk: Signs of trouble in Paradise

There is a cliché about a man knowing he is in trouble with his woman whe she announces that “they need to talk”. In real life, you will find that talking is not really bad thing, because if some-one is still willinh to talk to you then at least they care and are tryinh to get on the same page with you. In fact, you should be worried when your woman stops talking, because that is a sure sign she fed up.

It is also a sure sign that she is talking to someone else who is actually listening in a way that she appreciates.

It is the same thing with sex. If your man isn’t interested any-more and there is no medical reason for it, then that’s a sign of trouble.

In short, he is releasing that built up steam elsewhere. The same way you need to talk and express your words is the same way he needs to express himself phyisically.

Be very afraid when you are not doing the talk/sex thing with each other anymore.

It is never a good sign when you don’t know what your personal person earns or what they spend money on, eithet.

If you do not trust each other en-ough for financial information to be shared and you do not respect each other enough to talk about how to use money to develop the family , why you are willing to share STDs?

The finance thing stretched from home care, to child care, to inheritance after death. You cannot think it is okay to have my money and your money residing in warring camps.

Ladies, put up your hand if you’re married to someone but a third party (your girlfriend, workmate, ex etc) knows more about your life than hubby does.

Okay, now use that raised hand to slap yourself, because it isn’t clever sharing the personal deta-ils of your lifr, hopes and dreams with someone else and then take your body and labour home to another person.

Men can be extremely idiotic em-otionally, but they are not comp-lete vegetables in the intuition department. They know you’re not their best friend and they reciprocate by taking the details of their lives elsewhere.

It goes the other way. If you do not know important things about your spousr then you need to check yourself.

Sometimes women/men act suprised when their spouses suddenly reveal a secret life, yet they do not even know their partner’s blood group.

Well, those people are not train-ed spies; if they manage to build a secret life it is because you have left them the loopholes in which to do so.

If you do not know where they go, what they do, how they spend their money – if they are not accessible to you at certain times of the day – don’t blame anyone but yourself when they pop up with a second wife and several childrens who ages range snugly in the gaps between yours.

If your jet-setting spouse has never once offered to take you along on a business trip for some honeymoon – isn’t fun, then he or she is taking someone else.

All those governmet officials who a ccompany Olympic athletes, or go upcountry to retreats and worksbops – they are all taking someone.

If all you are doing is bidding them farewell, then you are blind. Or you also get up to some playing while the cat is away.

If you do not laugh with each other, then that is a sure sign of trouble. Even the most strict, straight-laced couple has a private joke only they know about. Laughter is like the filler you put to makr the tiles look neat and leak-proof.

If yout person doesn’t under-stand what makes you laugh, chances are that they will not understand what brings out your other important emotions like anger, sorrow, remorse or desire.

Do you know what your wife left the house wearing today? Score yourself based on what you know from underwear to jewellery to perfume.

I take a certain pride in knowing the intimate stuff about my personal person, but if you can not be motivated by love and get-ting to know the person, then maybe you can use jealousy and suspicon as your motivation.

You see, if you do not know her perfume or jewellery, how will you know when she comes home smelling like someone else, or if she is too attached to a trinket which someone else gave her?


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